Exhaustion……………

Its February still considerably the beginning of a new year just a month ago I was excited and hopeful for what was to come. Yet today I find myself struggling to accept that my current state exists ore even better what to do with all this unhappiness. Let’s talk about the “they say’s” whoever they are anyways…. They say if you don’t like your current situation you have the power to change it, they say no matter where you are or what you’ve done you can always change things for the better, they say there are power in the words we speak so positive affirmations and constantly declaring out loud all this great stuff over yourself, life, and the ones you love will form to fruition if only we speak it and believe. Come to think of it that last one I might be “they”, LOL. My point is that sometimes even when we fight to push forward and believe in all that “they say” sometimes things just don’t add up.

Keeping in line with what this blog is about today I felt the need to share the level of exhaustion that comes along with parenting, and adulting as a whole and then imagine doing both alone in a world designed for partnership. The shit is beyond draining and somedays….no most days I feel as if I’m drowning. My whole life I’ve been a high performer I was a good student a product of Cleveland Public Schools, Major Work programs- shout out to my city and my classmates you da best! I hold my B.S. form Ursuline college and MBA from University of Phoenix. I am extremely driven, flexible, supportive, hardworking, achieving success is important to me and my personal signature on all that I do. It is all that I have so I try with my whole heart to sign it at all times with excellence. And although I have many accomplishments that I am proud of along the way here I am 41 years old and still feeling lost as if I haven’t begun to hit the tip of the iceberg let alone truly realizing just how great in size the iceberg may be.

This pandemic and all the in between things that has happened over the years has been extremely draining to say the least. I often joke with my sister and tell her okay now I am at pandemic point of exhaustion. I thought I was navigating this thing gracefully! CDC said go left my employer said go right and I was asking them both just how soon and how fast did you need me to move that way. All the guidance and back/forth is hard to maintain the momentum. So, what are things we as women, we as moms, we as individuals, we as heads of our households can do to help sustain when periods of exhaustion creep in? Remembering that this blog is about me/us sharing and connecting. I by no way proclaim to be an expert on any subject I write about I’m just sharing pieces of me, my testimonies, and hoping it helps somebody or that you share with me and we both learn along the way. Below are my ways to regroup, I’d love to hear yours!

· Self-mental coaching: Remembering that I am an adult learning trainer by profession and truly believe in continuous education and development I coach myself. Yes, you are correct I talk to me sometimes in my head if it gets really deep, I will talk out loud and all that! Sometimes a sis has to do what a sis has to do, okay yall. We talk about our feelings-letting go and releasing is so beneficial to mental health it isn’t funny! If you are a person that hold on to things often-especially you grudge holders I challenge you to release that mess Tuh-day! I do the “being Mary Jane” with stickies around the mirror/in my closet/on my desk and constantly speak life and positivity into me and everything around me too. I remind myself that it is “mind over matter” here and that my mind is the strongest muscle in my body through my thoughts I will win!

· Reading: This one I’m sure a lot of people do or don’t LOL, if you enjoy reading, I’m certain this one helps tremendously. My go to books are absolutely fiction I love the ghetto kingpin hustling kind of love books...… seriously. I often swear in my past life I was a hustler, shout out to my BFF little sister Ms. Ivy Lee she is one of Thee Dopest story tellers in the game, you hear me! Her books, short series and now movies will remove you completely from reality and have your whole heart swearing you are a part of the action, check her out yall and thank me later! Lately though I find myself reading with intent this time instead of just trying to get away I believe I’m seeking elevation from my reading. Hoping to be better because of what I read, maybe learn a new skill or have a new interest or be smarter with money and decision making. If you don’t like reading, I encourage you to give it a try even if its an audio book finding something else to concentrate on outside of your current life stressors and learning while doing so cant be too bad. As for me, Ill definitely stick with good old fashion way to read a book….. something about it I just love.

· Bedroom Concert: Yup sounds like just what you are envisioning! Ya girl cannot sing a lick! But when I’m drained and need to boost up a bit, I go into full concert mode in my room doors closed, makeup/mask is off and I AM GOING IN! Depending on the exact stress of the day it may be an R & B Special, or Gospels greatest hits either way by the end of the show I am completely rejuvenated feeling like I can take over the world! Something I tell myself I try to do every day (Jay use to love Pinky and the Brain, LOL).

· Retail and/or Kid Therapy: Now if I'm being honest this one right here is by far my favorite way to destress. However, this can also get you into some serious trouble ask my credit score it experienced a hot from retail therapy first hand. In this blog remember we are focused on life, mom-life, not loosing ourselves I never told you I was focused on financial responsibilities here so please proceed implementing this option with caution. I am also a huge advocate of financial responsibility because I learned the hard way. We share a lot of great information on this through my financial service business C & D (www.cdtaxfinancialservices.com) check us out if needed. Back to the fun part- there is no greater feeling then taking sometime away from your stressful activities to have a "treat day". I am completely guilty, the mom that says " I know I need to be saving, but I work hard I deserve.. " Yes, I know that's what we say to justify our emotional spending every time, LOL. Alright so my truth- because I am the head of my household I cant afford random hits like this every time life gets me down. I am also a professional and should always look to par for the positions I want not the current one have, my mom taught me that at a very young age. When we look good, smell good , we ultimately feel good.

Tell me what are some things you do?